Don’t panic, just because you’ve never orgasmed, it doesn’t mean that you can’t. And you’re not alone either. Statistics show that there’s approximately ten percent of women who are believed to have never orgasmed (anorgasmia), either with their partner, or alone during masturbation. And, during sexual intercourse, there’s only about a third of women who regularly have an orgasm. That’s pretty shocking hey, because we can all do it.
If we know the tricks.
Women have it a bit more tricky in the orgasm department than men do that’s not under doubt. Women can go for years having sex without orgasms, many believing they just aren’t meant to.
And that’s where we start to fall foul, right from the bat. Because our brains make a HUGE difference to our ability as a lover to climax. If a woman is mentally tense (or a man for that matter, but we’ll come to that in another article) then it doesn’t matter how old she is, how experienced, psychologically our brain actually shuts down our sexual (physical) pleasures and urges because we don’t need the extra stress put on our bodies through reproducing. As females are innately built to bear children with their partners, whether married or otherwise, this causes the first stumbling block.
Related point: Don’t worry about your husband. Sure men generally get a kick out of making their lovers buck around like a freaking buckaroo, but as long as he’s being sexually satisfied, then what does he have to complain about? You might even come out of this experience with some tips to help him with some lack of ability in a department. I mean. There are a lot of women out there who find orgasming easier if their partner gives good oral. The struggle somehow disappears. We have our own opinions on why. But not all men like going down on their woman. They have their own part to play in delivering our sexual gratification in ways that give us the best chance of reaching climax.
That’s why when you have a yoni tantra massage we spend time at the beginning in relaxing your mind so that your stress evaporates and doesn’t prevent your body from feeling.
So, relax and put your mind at rest. There is nothing wrong with you if you’ve never organsmed. You’re just dealing with life. And we can help. We’re a kind of sex therapist if you like, one who admittedly gives you a huge amount of pleasure, but sex and orgasm dysfunction does exist. And that’s why we’re here.
We will also work with you so that you really understand through experience that being a sensual or sexual being isn’t just about having that elusive orgasm. It’s about a wonderful journey of discovery. Allowing yourself to give yourself over to your inner emotions, and establish a joy in freedom.
We’ll work with you to show you positions that work, to stimulate your blood flow (which is all important just like it is to getting a man’s penis hard) and techniques to use once you’re relaxed for physical stimulation that will, in turn, simply blow your mind. Don’t get us wrong, this isn’t going to be an instructional session. You can lie back, take some deep breaths and enjoy the blissful intimacy of being with a partner who is trained to know what to do.
But, we will direct you towards orgasmic bliss with a few tender pointers along the way. Our advice could be verbal, or just a gentle movement of your buttocks, but as a female who has never orgasmed, you’ll love what we do and soon you’ll feel it’s normal to reach orgasm, if not every, most times.
Now, we’ve been through that, what’s also important to understand is that when you masturbate, the orgasm is the primary goal. During your session, if you’ have never masturbated, you’ll learn these wonderful tricks too. But, when you’re having sex, whether this be with your partner, or a stranger, then don’t read too much into that end point. Connecting in a pure moment of togetherness is a fabulous gift. Once you know that you are no longer that woman who has never had an orgasm, you’ll automatically stop craving it so much.
Through relaxing in this way, you’ll no longer be focussed on ‘I’ve never been able to orgasm,’ and you’ll let down your barriers, enjoy the art of being touched and touching and in so doing, your blood will flow, your sensuality will rise and you’ll become the sexual being you never knew you had in you.
This process is all about breaking down that first wall that is in the way of women have never had an orgasm and moving forward from that.
Sidenote: If you’ve tried everything and you’ve still never orgasmed, don’t be too embarrassed to go to the doctors. Some meds throw things off, or it might be that your blood flow isn’t fast enough. You’ll be pleased to know there are medications for that!
What’s important in this journey is that you don’t give up, start faking (or continue) and accept that you are always going to be one of them women who have never had a proper orgasm and that you just have to live with sexual tension throughout the rest of your life. The answers to the question about having a great, mind blowing orgasm aren’t that difficult, but you need to know where to look. And this is where our trained tantra therapist comes in with pointing you on the right path while experiencing a wonderfully joyful few hours.
To find out more about how we can help you discover the truth of your body’s delights, drop us a text on 07982 491392. We’ve included a great text template for you below:
I would like to enquire about booking a yoni tantra session with you to help me with reaching an orgasm as I’ve never orgasmed. I am available on xxx at xxx and would like to book xxx hour session with you.
Include any health concerns here.
I would like to pay my deposit by bank transfer/ cash)