I’ve never orgasmed. Help!

I’ve never orgasmed. Help!

Don’t panic, just because you’ve never orgasmed, it doesn’t mean that you can’t. And you’re not alone either. Statistics show that there’s approximately ten percent of women who are believed to have never orgasmed (anorgasmia), either with their partner, or alone during masturbation. And, during sexual intercourse, there’s only about a third of women who regularly have an orgasm. That’s pretty shocking hey, because we can all do it.

Yoni tantra massage romford Essex
Only about 1/3rd of women have orgasms. Don’t be part of this statistic. Read on.

If we know the tricks.

Women have it a bit more tricky in the orgasm department than men do that’s not under doubt. Women can go for years having sex without orgasms, many believing they just aren’t meant to.

And that’s where we start to fall foul, right from the bat. Because our brains make a HUGE difference to our ability as a lover to climax. If a woman is mentally tense (or a man for that matter, but we’ll come to that in another article) then it doesn’t matter how old she is, how experienced, psychologically our brain actually shuts down our sexual (physical) pleasures and urges because we don’t need the extra stress put on our bodies through reproducing. As females are innately built to bear children with their partners, whether married or otherwise, this causes the first stumbling block.

Related point: Don’t worry about your husband. Sure men generally get a kick out of making their lovers buck around like a freaking buckaroo, but as long as he’s being sexually satisfied, then what does he have to complain about? You might even come out of this experience with some tips to help him with some lack of ability in a department. I mean. There are a lot of women out there who find orgasming easier if their partner gives good oral. The struggle somehow disappears. We have our own opinions on why. But not all men like going down on their woman. They have their own part to play in delivering our sexual gratification in ways that give us the best chance of reaching climax.

That’s why when you have a yoni tantra massage we spend time at the beginning in relaxing your mind so that your stress evaporates and doesn’t prevent your body from feeling.

So, relax and put your mind at rest. There is nothing wrong with you if you’ve never organsmed. You’re just dealing with life. And we can help. We’re a kind of sex therapist if you like, one who admittedly gives you a huge amount of pleasure, but sex and orgasm dysfunction does exist. And that’s why we’re here.

We will also work with you so that you really understand through experience that being a sensual or sexual being isn’t just about having that elusive orgasm. It’s about a wonderful journey of discovery. Allowing yourself to give yourself over to your inner emotions, and establish a joy in freedom.

We’ll work with you to show you positions that work, to stimulate your blood flow (which is all important just like it is to getting a man’s penis hard) and techniques to use once you’re relaxed for physical stimulation that will, in turn, simply blow your mind. Don’t get us wrong, this isn’t going to be an instructional session. You can lie back, take some deep breaths and enjoy the blissful intimacy of being with a partner who is trained to know what to do.

But, we will direct you towards orgasmic bliss with a few tender pointers along the way. Our advice could be verbal, or just a gentle movement of your buttocks, but as a female who has never orgasmed, you’ll love what we do and soon you’ll feel it’s normal to reach orgasm, if not every, most times.
Now, we’ve been through that, what’s also important to understand is that when you masturbate, the orgasm is the primary goal. During your session, if you’ have never masturbated, you’ll learn these wonderful tricks too. But, when you’re having sex, whether this be with your partner, or a stranger, then don’t read too much into that end point. Connecting in a pure moment of togetherness is a fabulous gift. Once you know that you are no longer that woman who has never had an orgasm, you’ll automatically stop craving it so much.

The art of sensual massage yoni massage
Enjoy the art of being touched

Through relaxing in this way, you’ll no longer be focussed on ‘I’ve never been able to orgasm,’ and you’ll let down your barriers, enjoy the art of being touched and touching and in so doing, your blood will flow, your sensuality will rise and you’ll become the sexual being you never knew you had in you.

This process is all about breaking down that first wall that is in the way of women have never had an orgasm and moving forward from that.
Sidenote: If you’ve tried everything and you’ve still never orgasmed, don’t be too embarrassed to go to the doctors. Some meds throw things off, or it might be that your blood flow isn’t fast enough. You’ll be pleased to know there are medications for that!

What’s important in this journey is that you don’t give up, start faking (or continue) and accept that you are always going to be one of them women who have never had a proper orgasm and that you just have to live with sexual tension throughout the rest of your life. The answers to the question about having a great, mind blowing orgasm aren’t that difficult, but you need to know where to look. And this is where our trained tantra therapist comes in with pointing you on the right path while experiencing a wonderfully joyful few hours.

To find out more about how we can help you discover the truth of your body’s delights, drop us a text on 07982 491392. We’ve included a great text template for you below:
I would like to enquire about booking a yoni tantra session with you to help me with reaching an orgasm as I’ve never orgasmed. I am available on xxx at xxx and would like to book xxx hour session with you.
Include any health concerns here.
I would like to pay my deposit by bank transfer/ cash)
Thank you

Sensual massage, Romford.

Sensual massage, Romford.

Tips to giving a great Sensual Massage from the experts based in Romford, Essex.

OK so here’s the thing, you’re under stress at work, from your family or just generally and a sensual massage is the last thing on your mind. But, imagine this. Your partner is invariably under the same strain and imagine how they will feel if the come home to enjoy a relaxing sensual massage. It can help relieve your mood and theirs, and release tension from building-up. In addition, offering a tactile gift of a sensual massage is showing you how intimate you care about your loved one — that you’re more than just a provider of necessary day to day services.

Sensual massage, Romford
The art of sensual massage is often just confidence

  If you’ve always wanted your loved one to give you a massage, one of the best ways to cheer you up (and by default them) is to give them a massage first. Making the first move helps to shift both of your mindsets it’s an informal demonstration of what you want from them and helps to turn them into a masseur.

The fact is that many are interested in giving you a massage, we just don’t do it. Not because they do not want to, but because they are afraid to do something wrong or the experience is not satisfactory. There is really no need to put this stress on himself — almost everyone likes (and receives substantial benefits) the touch of power. In addition, the massage technique greatly improves the more often you do it.

 If you want to learn how to massage, you will find some practical techniques in this guide that will give you an excellent starting point. However, you have no right to try to master all the techniques.

 Some women think about their last visit to the spa and enjoy a massage that you thoroughly enjoy. Remember the experience in your mind, think about techniques, emotions and stress, making it a pleasant experience. Then start trying to recreate this experience with your partner. You will appreciate the effort and enjoy the experience… And to be fair, he can order another soon!

The benefits of a sensual massage

 For example, you know that getting a standard massage can solve the twisting of the neck and relieve muscle pain, especially back pain [1, 2]. But did you know that massage has proven to be effective in reducing arthritis, anxiety, depression, cancer, fibromyalgia and more? Circulation can also improve massage. So even if you don’t get the sensual massage quite right, you can still give your partner some benefits from the experience. And relaxing together is always good, so you shouldn’t be too nervous about how this will transpire.

 Massage can improve mood and immune system, and may also increase energy levels.

 Massage is beneficial not only to the person receiving the massage. Giving one can make you feel easier and improve anxiety and depression, too!

Massage is an interesting part of foreplay, but even if it is a non-sexual massage without sexual connotations, massage can make you feel more connected with your partner, perhaps because people can express emotions to the touch.

  Risks of massage

  There are many benefits when massaging, but there are some risks if you do not know how to administer it correctly [17, 18]. If you pinch any part of the body, there may be temporary pain, too deep massage can leave persistent pain, especially if you have existing injuries, so be gentle.

 To obtain the residues released by muscle to body massage and extreme (but unlikely) events, you can create so-called rhabdomyolysis [20], which is one of the causes of pain and disease after massage [21] intoxication so drink water when you have finished.

 It’s important to dilute the carrier oil to avoid irritation of the skin, you will want to make sure that any hot stone is not enough to cause burns and blisters. Finally, massage candles can increase the atmosphere, but be sure to test the heat of the wax before using. Temperature, but it can still be quite warm. Pour higher to allow the wax to cool as it falls.

Fortunately, massage injuries are usually rare.

 Set the mood

  Think about it, just for a moment, about the last time you enjoyed a professional massage. The atmosphere is not clutter, and there may be a light and refreshing fragrance in the room, you realize the moment you arrive, right?

  It is possible that even when you just make an appointment at the reception, you can listen to the relaxing music of “spa” gently tapping in the background. Most spas are not particularly bright, even in the reception area; however, rooms where you want to massage often have poor lighting, a pleasant smell and a favorable atmosphere.

  In other words, even before the first meeting with a massage therapist, you begin to enter a state of relaxation.

  Even if you give a massage at home, you still want to spend a little time (if you have one) creating a zen atmosphere in the room, where you will perform the massage.

 Pre-massage adjustments do not necessarily take a lot of time (usually only a few minutes) and do not cost expensive. However, the preparation time should reflect the careful attention given by the owner of the spa to create the right atmosphere.

 If you need a little extra time to prepare the room, it’s not a bad idea to give you a nice and warm bath, which helps your muscles relax and helps you prepare for this relaxing experience.


  There are many channels on YouTube that offer relaxing music and instrumental perfectly creates a spa atmosphere. The duration of these videos ranges from about 1 hour to 8 hours.

  Some sites offer a wide variety of CDs, DVDs and digital downloads of relaxing music (including natural sounds and ambient noise), all specially designed to create a perfect and relaxed atmosphere. Of course, through popular sites like Amazon there are thousands of options, iTunes and Google Play. (Popular options for masseurs include Carlos nakai, Celtic harp music (instrumental) and Enya, etc.)

  Through the Internet broadcast site you do not lack easy music, you will find some great songs that can be listened for free in this playlist.

  While the art of sensual massage provides the perfect guide to foreplay (you will learn everything you need to know about foreplay) and potential intimacy for a long night, massage does not always lead to physical intimacy. It provides the opportunity to be physically close to each other, and allows the two to snuggle up for a “pillow talk”, which is important to maintain clear, open and honest communication.


  Setting several tea lights in the room will provide enough light in the room. Aromatherapy candles are also a great way to set the mood in the room, because the smell is actually the most powerful that we will delve into aromatherapy in the next section.

  Looking for more ideas to set up the scene? Check out our secret massage guide.

  Room Perfume/Aromatherapy

  The researchers found that the part of our brain that controls emotions — the center of the deep edge — is directly related to the olfactory system. Therefore, various smells have a powerful effect on the mood of a person, certain smells easily evoke memories based on already with this smell over time.

  Using this knowledge as a basis, then the theory behind aromatherapy is that essential oils have pharmacological effects (although no scientific evidence has been found, preliminary clinical trials have yielded positive results).

 Essential oils can be placed in an aroma diffuser; once a little heat is applied (usually with a small candle), the oil evaporates into the air, exudes a pleasant and healing fragrance. Essential oils can also be applied directly to the skin with warm water or massaging a few drops. (However, it is better to ask you first if you have any sensitivity to any particular essential oil.)

  If you are trying to decide which aromatherapy oils are best suited for relaxation (or sensual massage), here is a brief list of seven essential oils and their reported effects.


  Although lavender has been used to relieve minor cuts and burns, it has become particularly popular in recent years due to its ability to promote a sense of relaxation, relieve insomnia and relieve headache symptoms [23].


  Chamomile is a very effective sedative. It is widely used to promote good sleep for those suffering from insomnia and has a sedative effect [24].

  Lemon oil

  It is said that lemon oil can lift the mood and is considered very effective in relieving stress and depression.

  Vanilla Oil

  possibly the most popular (and also the most popular) of essential oils, vanilla essential oils are more than simply improving the taste of food. Vanilla essential oil is said to have a calm, comfortable and relaxing effect.


  The attractive floral and fruity aromas derived from jasmine essential oil have been praised by perfumers since ancient times. Jasmine is considered an antidepressant, it calms the mood. However, essential oil of jasmine is also considered to have aphrodisiac qualities.


  Sandalwood offers a fairly unique aroma; in fact, the part from which the sandalwood essential oil is derived takes five to eighty years to mature anywhere. Sandalwood is said to induce a state of calm, meditation, relieves anxiety and anger, and promotes better sleep. Aroma similar to human pheromones, sandalwood is also considered aphrodisiac.


  Also popular in perfume, it is said that bergamot improves the mood of a person and relieves the feeling of anxiety.

  Essential Oils Warning: Although essential oils have many benefits, they can be quite effective and irritate the skin. Therefore, you just want to use a few drops of your favorite essential oils in carrier oils such as jojoba, coconut, almond or olive oil. Approximately 10 drops per 1 teaspoon carrier oil [26] or per ounce of adult carrier oil [27].

  Ambient temperature

  Remember that your man’s shirt will be removed during the massage, so the temperature in the room should be comfortable for him. Warm sheets (freshly removed from the dryer) and/or flannel sheets often help you stay comfortable during the massage.

 Massage Techniques

  It is very clear that the gift of massage is one of the most powerful gifts that you can give to other people important to you. It is intimate and pleasant, shows a selfless dedication. However, if you are not sure how to massage, do not exert any undue pressure on yourself. Time.

  With this, let’s start learning a few simple and effective techniques for giving you a massage.

 Note: each of these, your partner will lie down — face down — because you work the muscles of the upper and lower back.

 1. Knead

 Although not many of us make our own cookies or other bread from scratch, this technique will be quite familiar if you have ever had experience of kneading dough, it is usually used in Swedish massage [28].

  When kneading, you will use both palms (and wrists) to deeply massage the muscles, using small semicircles to manipulate the muscles. Using the palm of your hand, you will put pressure on the muscles, turning the right hand clockwise and the left hand counterclockwise.

  As a rule, it will alternate from one hand to the other, rhythmically keeping the wrist relatively straight. (Bending too much or too much of the wrist can cause excessive stress on the muscles, causing pain in the wrist.)

  2. Husk

  With the peel, you will lie with a flat hand on your back, each of your fingers tightly pressed, each other. After that, you will put your other hand directly on top, then use the upper hand to put pressure on the muscles.

  The goal of peeling is to allow increased pressure on the muscles themselves, which will help to relax the muscles of the back more quickly and completely.

  3. Incitement

  With the fan-shaped technique, you will begin to lay flat with your hands, fingers together, slowly and constantly moving through the muscles. On the other hand, also flat together with your fingers, on the other hand go immediately, moving a little higher and lower on the back.

  With alternating hands, you will slowly move through your back, either on the shoulder or in the lower back and move to the opposite end. If you find that you need to apply additional pressure, consider bending the joints inside your fingers (but the fingers are still firmly pressed). Find out that it is easy to apply additional pressure through the fingers of the “joints”. However, you still want to measure the amount of pressure on your comfort and adjust it properly.


We cannot stress enough just how critical non-sexual touch is. It’s one of our natural human cravings, whether that’s from a massage therapist or something you provide to your man, a sensual erotic massage is just what the doctor ordered. 

For the sensual massage which leads to foreplay, you should aim to remain as close to him as possible. And that’s throughout the entire massage. You may also want to consider a full body sensual massage.

For a few tips on how to give him a wonderfully erotic sensual massage that leads to something sexual between the two of you, sit on his buttocks as you smooth away the stress from his shoulders and lower back with long, sensual massage strokes. Doing this has the effect of increasing your physical touch, more of your body connects which leads to you both experiencing greater intimacy. And what greater feeling is there than that?

Sensual massage, Romford. Guide to erogenous zones

The area of the inner thigh is hugely erogenous. So, after you’ve massaged his back muscles, it’s time to request him to turn over. When he’s laying on his back, then you can gently massage the inner thigh with soft, sensual touch. The aim is to delicate and send him crazy.

Then another area which is highly erogenous is that between his belly button to his genitalia. 

Gently massage this section of skin for a few minutes with sensual strokes passing over the tip of his penis (glans area). The sensitivity of this arousing touch will have him begging you for more. But, hold off. Send your sensual touch towards the small ridge where the glans meets his shaft and gently massage around here.

An erotic massage for a man results in him enjoying a happy ending or hand relief which is otherwise known as a hand job or tugjob. But, we hope we’re making it clear how enjoyable this can be for both parties as you glide your body over his, enjoying stimulating him with the sensuality of your nakedness connecting with his. The way you feel him respond to your sensual touch and the way his head cricks back in absolute utter bliss. If you’d like to experience this first by experiencing this first at Sensual massage, Romford, then you are more than welcome.

A similar type of massage that focuses on erotic power and energy is called a lingam massage. You can read about this here.


Which massage oil should I use?

You can use whichever you like, we’ve given you some ideas above on some essential oils to add to your massage oil or massage gel. But the choice is yours and always check out first whether you or he are alergic to the oils. A great sensual massage oil we find is always warmed first. 

Is a good sensual massage the same as a therapeutic massage?

it can be in that there is a therapy to be gained from having a sensual massage, but it’s not the same. If you go and have a hotel massage, it won’t be the same as a wonderfully relaxing sensual massage where every single one of your nerve endings are on fire and your body is begging for release.

Is a yoni massage the same as a lingam massage?

In the sense that a yoni massage is the massage of the female genitals and the lingam is the massage of the male genitals (otherwise known as handjob, hand relief, tugjob or happy ending) but other than that, the techniques are different.

What constitutes a good sexy massage?

That’s down to you to decide what works best and builds your own passion as well as your partner’s. We all have individual needs and responses, so what makes  a good massage for some people may be different for another.

Can I come to you and have a sensual massage at your place in Romford and then use what I experience to give my partner a better sensual massage at home?

Yes for sure, that’s what many of our clients do. They learn about the power of touch from receiving the best sensual massage from us at our specialist place in Romford as we are experts in this field and then go home and play with their partner using these newfound skills. It can be very erotic.

A few tips to help you giving a great sensual massage. Lot’s of Love From Us x


Sensual massage, Romford are based in the mid way between East London and the rest of Essex, we’re right on the border so access is really easy from both. If you’re looking to book an appointment at Sensual massage, Romford then you can do so by texting 07982 491392. Don’t forget to tell us whether you’re male or female so that we know which sensual massage therapist to place you with. We only offer opposite sex massages.

Sensual massage, Romford are a professional operation and have been giving amazing sensual massage experiences to people from the local area and further afield for ten years. We are English, clean and tantra qualified. There isn’t a place in the Romford area which offers sensual massages in the same style and of the same professional level as sensual massage, Romford. When you book a sensual massage with us, you can be sure that you are not only safe, but your privacy will be protected. We expect the same from you in return.